Saving My Own Life

" Where did I go wrong, I lost myself...
Somewhere along in the bitterness...
And I would have stayed up all night...
Had I known how to save this life..."

I have a great job, good pay, good environment, nice place to live, nice neighborhood... I keep wondering to myself "is this the type of life I'm going to be living in for another 10 to 20 years?". Some how, the question create a resentment in me. I hate to answer it as I already know the answer to it. I guest....

A great man once told me, not knowing what I want clearly is the most dangerous decision would 1 ever made. Because it's a way to escape from getting what I want. A back door. have I reminde myself for so many times yet. I have done nothing to change it. I have betrayed my own life. Keep thinking of it make me feel so low...

Some how there are a small side of me that say "You are doing the life living thing, un-consciously, it doesn't have to be big..." "No! It gotta to be big!" Say my other half. "Yet u haven't done anything to make it happen, and you doesn't seem to be having one "what u want in life thing!" so stop bullsh!ting aroung and work the hell out of your ass!!"

Yeap, my mind is totally messy lot sa stuff going on up there. Just cant seem to find a clear vision of my life, and no patient at all... Did I just say no patient?? which mean I must have some thing in mind, but didn't go out and do it. What a mess I have gotten into.

Yes, I have this vision for world peace. I believe in human race. I believe all human have 1 common thing in our life... which is music... like Bob Marley sayz, his vision is to unite the world with music. But still he died of drug abuse. Unlike the movies, in reality good people die early. People can take other people life with just 1 tick of the pistol trigger. Since no one to be blame the religious party and other so called "moral and right protection movement" blame. Blame the music it self ...

And rock and roll was among the victim. They call em' satanism, ghost wore shipper, sex, drug and alcohol are all being pointed at this great music. Beside people who sang classic, rap, hiphop, or what so ever music drink, have fun, have sex, making out and most of all take drug... but nobody see em'. Because may be the way they dress look clean...tidy... nice fashionable well rock on the other hand look dark, gothic they called it. But hey common it just a dress. Why blame us for the way we are and blame us for the thing that every body in the world do???!!!

Even in my family, people don't believe at me when I say music especially rock can change the world into a better place. They look down on me and say "it is noisy and get on with the reality!! Rock can't change the world!!". " Stop day dreaming it, just one of your fantasies!!".

Well let me tell ya this!!! I don't give a f@ck what you say!! Because rocking is my life!! I'm happy rocking out with my friend because is what I wanted to do. I'm not a hypocrite pretend to like stuff that other people like... rocking to my is like to love a person it can be force...it natural...it's me.....I not legend.... I'm not Beowolf.... but I'm wrock.... and I'm Kai!!!!!

So to all fella' rocker out there... rock ya life out.... be in contribution... as 1 day believe me...

1 rock concert can change histories.... and unite people in this world.... into one unit we called the human race!!!