Again a night without sleep...

goodness gracious..
It's 4 M IN THE MORNING..
My head numb and spinning...
There are just some more work to do...
But I don't blame you...

wizard of the paradox cast it spell...
the vanish the load that beyond repel...
I'm a joke...
don't even have the guts to look...

Summer just ended...
Flower started to be faded...
I never get the chance to even see it...
feel it...

it passes by...
a journal of life...

http://budokmilo.livejournal.com/

World Biggest IDIOT

Every one is out there to night, watching movie with friends and love ones...
me?!? Stuck here in my 4 wall and 6 level of aggravations...
and whole stack of exam papers to be mark...

I can believe I 'm such a fool to actually give chances after another to some one....
who again and again broken their promises....

Shame on you, if u fool me once...
Shame on me if you fool me twice....
Shame on my idiotic self if i been fooled again and again....

Being scolded with the "F" words on my face...
Being spilt on my feet by the parent during sports day...
Being curse and swear by the management on my 1st day here...
I must be an idiot to take up this job...

Lucky thing i found peace in the place I once hate...
I found happiness in the occupation I once hate...
I really hate my teachers...
My be that what make me a different one...

peliknya dunie ni... ape yang kita benci... kita tiba tiba suka....
haiz...
apalah nasib...
wahai komputer...engkau jer lah yang tahu segala isi hati ku....
hahahaha...
Aku ni dah giler agak nya....
tido lah... moga esok ok lah hati ku ini.....

Smile

The only thing that kept me in one piece is the sound of children laughter and hyper voice...

Totally out of my mind today...
Can't even pull a smile when I heard know bout the issue...
WTF... my patient really outrage...

But being me no matter how bad a person treated me...
I still forgive them...
forgiving is what make me the person I am today...
Thanks to the children I learn to shift quick...
I can't just bring my sad face all day...

It hurt...
It really hurt...
when the person u trusted the most betray that trust...

It really scary if I lost it...

once... there are some one there to calm me down...
hold my hand and I feel calm...
"V"-thanks for the moment in time...
now she is with some one else... and I'm all by myself...
Striving every moment in time....

what past is past...
what present to me is what it is...
what is in the future... is unknown...

waaaaa....I feel so bad now!! hahahahaha....

I just hope that the one in my heart now would forgive me for my behavior....
"Just as you are... Just as I am...
Our little imperfections that make us beautifully imperfect... "
Would you allow me to care for you...
hold you and I promise I never let go...
and love you till the end of my time....

my goodness... ok breath in... and out... and in... and out....

love got no reason...
love got no rhythm...
Kai you better get to school on time :)

My World

people ask me what do I wan in life...
I told them peace of mind... the serenity....
yet... day by day I get monstrosity...

The only reason I'm still here..
is because of them....
and that special some one I get to know...

no matter what's the answer...
Physically it doesn't matter...
but emotionally it will be something worth remembering...

as I have no idea how it started off...
"like" might turn to "love" if the path cross...
well, still I'm in the middle of a cross road...
wondering which path to take...
I'm just a human being...
in search of a life offered....
no more no less....

a memory that can't be erased...
a person that can't be replace...
we are special in our own way...

My World
I write this song once I hear the rhythm I compose in Garage Band...
The lyric sound a bit weird as it what I was thinking at that particular moment...

Erti Hidup...

Aku bertanya pada rakan ku...

apakah pendapat mereka tentang peragawati atau model...

jawab mereka... "Fake"..... palsu...

kerana yang menjadikan diri mereka cantik adalah jurugambar...

Itu pandangan mereka...

Dimanakah patut ku berdiri sekarang...

Dalam ranjau hidup yang penuh temberang...

hipokrit dan meterialistik ini...

Tiap hari kita mendiskriminasikan diri kita...

kita meletakkan diri kita dalam kategori tertentu...

kita tanda diri kita sebagai cantik, hodoh, gemuk, kurus, kaya, dan miskin...

masing masing ingin maju...

akhirnya saling berpijakkan antara satu sama lain...

Lihatlah betapa bodohnya manusia...

Agama menyuruh kite bersatu... tetapi malangnya antara agama... kita saling berperang....

Orang yang tidak beragama pun sama.... tiada bezanya...

Semuanya dusta...

apakah erti hidup ku ini...

Kepada agama ku taati...

kepada orang tua ku, ku hormati...

kepada darah daging ku, ku sayangi...

kepada manusia sejagat yang pentingkan diri sendiri... ku cintai...

...bingkisan masa lampau...